I spend a lot of time with really smart, accomplished women who are really lacking in assertiveness. When I ask these brilliant women why they aren't more assertive, I get two common answers; 1) What if I'm wrong? 2) I don't want to hurt anyone else. Let's unpack these a little bit.
"What if I'm wrong?" Why are women so afraid […]
Recently my friend, Joy, told me this story. Joy was working sixty plus hours a week doing work that she loved, but not getting paid what she deserved and certainly not getting the respect that she deserved. She asked for a raise numerous times. She was denied. She asked for an assistant. She was denied. She asked for some respect. […]
Losing my voice caught me off guard in that I thought I'd had it all figured out. My voice was strong, my confidence high, my place in the world solid and strong. Then all of a sudden it was gone; my voice, my confidence, my ability to stay strong even in the face of disapproval or disagreement from others. How […]
Dear Women of the World,
Please start speaking up to ask for what you want. People can neither read your mind nor just know what you want. They can't. It's time for you to calmly and pleasantly ask for what you want.
Here are some examples:
"I would like a raise because I have proven my worth. Let me […]
The other day, a friend of mine posted a pretty cruel and divisive political post on Facebook. He isn’t the only one, of course. Sometimes I just unfriend or hide really nasty people or comments, but this man is a close friend. I care about him and his family. I often think I should just ignore these posts, yet on […]
Last week, one of my clients was going through a very difficult time. She was ready to just succumb to the unhappiness she was feeling. Understandably, she felt angry, out of control, and pissed off at me and the world. Yet she sent me an email that had this line,
"I realized that I do need to find some happiness […]
What do you think my clients most frequently tell me they want from loved ones? It's to be seen and heard. They want to be understood, listened to, loved, and accepted. Why do so many of us feel as if we are not seen and heard? One reason is because the world is filled with pretty dreadful listeners. People who […]
When I first started my coaching business many people consulted me to be very careful about my opinions. "Don't talk about politics, religion, etc. You might alienate some people." Their advice was well intentioned but it really didn't work for me. I'm a women's empowerment coach. I help women to find their voice in life, in business, and most especially […]
Last year I opened the virtual doors to my own business. It was a dream come true brought about by hard work and lots of advice from some really brilliant people. One piece of advice I received from a number of sources was to get active on social media but to make sure that my activity wasn’t political. This advice […]