I spend a lot of time with people who want to achieve their goals, but can’t figure out why they don’t. They often tell me that they are just lazy or too busy, but rarely are either of those reasons true. Here are the two most common reasons that people don’t achieve their goals and some suggestions for overcoming those reasons.
- They are not really our goals. We say they are, but a deeper dive usually brings up a lot of “have tos” “shoulds,” etc. “I really should get that graduate degree.” “I have to lose weight.” “Have tos” and “shoulds” are externally focused and thus not very motivational. Who is excited about doing those things?So where did we get these “have tos”and “shoulds”? Most likely from listening to others and not listening to ourselves. We got them from buying into belief systems that might not be our own and that don’t align with our values. Before you set out to accomplish a goal, make sure it’s a goal that you want and makes sense to your life.If you are happy with yourself and your current weight, don’t change it because of a standard that someone else has set up. That won’t be sustainable or enjoyable. If you truly want a graduate degree, go figure out a way to get it, but don’t do it because someone else has told you that you “need” it. Wants are motivating and needs are scary. Make sure your goals are what you want. #goals #motivation #achievement Click To Tweet
- We are scared we are not capable of achieving the goal that we set out to achieve. We say we want it and we really do, but something inside of us is saying, “Who do you think you are trying to achieve that?” Then all of a sudden, we lose our motivation. We either stop trying to achieve that goal or we do a really lazy job of it and then blame our laziness for the lack of achievement.This one is a tough one to get over because it requires overriding some pretty strong messages and stories that we’ve been telling ourselves for a very long time. Ask yourself, “How true is it that I can’t achieve this?” “What old story am I telling myself that is holding me back from getting what I really want out of life.”
You are then going to want to take the hardest step of all. Step into your greatest fears and worries. Your fear of failing or succeeding or of having your life go in a way that you never thought was possible. Obviously somewhat easier said than done, but one of the best ways to do it is to take small, manageable steps toward your goal. Set a larger goal such as running a marathon, but start with small daily goals that lead to small successes.
Few people achieve what they want in life and credit it to laziness, lack of resources, others, etc. It takes energy and motivation to find happiness and success in life. Start listening to what you are saying to yourself about making those goals. Change your mindset first, and then start stepping into your fears. Fabulous things await you on the other side.
|Stop Running from Your Feelings||The “31 Ways to Be Assertive” Challenge|
|Stop Running from Your Feelings|
|The “31 Ways to Be Assertive” Challenge|